I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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