wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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