At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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