He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
