Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
You ate ashes out of my bong
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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