I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I love having hate sex.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
