Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts http://tfl.nu/1w8r
  Replies (28) Good night (5150) Bad night (1098)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties! http://tfl.nu/mly2
  Replies (12) Good night (953) Bad night (4767)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  it's gonna be a chat room kind of night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): it's gonna be a chat room kind of night http://tfl.nu/owfm
  Replies (24) Good night (774) Bad night (4277)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife. http://tfl.nu/c5bq
  Replies (36) Good night (9953) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox. http://tfl.nu/ld2z
  Replies (2) Good night (2576) Bad night (765)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon

  (407): View more from Florida

  Covered in confetti and bad decisions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon (407): Covered in confetti and bad decisions http://tfl.nu/kydc
  Replies (9) Good night (1867) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable. http://tfl.nu/tpm2
  Replies (3) Good night (1987) Bad night (883)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier. http://tfl.nu/vwj3
  Replies (9) Good night (1414) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  You know i'm the father figure

  (1-941): View more from Florida

  Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): You know i'm the father figure (1-941): Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad http://tfl.nu/6iwj
  Replies (12) Good night (831) Bad night (1788)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm http://tfl.nu/x3tv
  Replies (9) Good night (1798) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any http://tfl.nu/i4l6
  Replies (3) Good night (432) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him http://tfl.nu/g8jv
  Replies (4) Good night (564) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!! http://tfl.nu/ekhg
  Replies (1) Good night (530) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip http://tfl.nu/scxm
  Replies (1) Good night (600) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going? http://tfl.nu/v2ci
  Replies (5) Good night (846) Bad night (471)

Randomize