Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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