is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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