they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Floor bacon is actually really good
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize