I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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