So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
