a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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