He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
