is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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