I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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