More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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