i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I know her cup size but not her name....
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
