so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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