just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
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