Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
