I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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