Swine flu. Run for my life!
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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