just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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