butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize