You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
