I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize