i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
