I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Writing my paper on freud at bar
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
wat bout pragnant strippers??
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day