just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I pour the whiskey from now on
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
