i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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