its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
