Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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