It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
