ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i just had sex bonerless
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Randomize
