i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
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