what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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