I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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