we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
