I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
