You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just pee around me
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.