Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
