The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize