it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
