got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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