She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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