Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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