I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
