Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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