So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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